Thats what my coworker MIchelle Sommerville said in regards to my islamic DRESS as i call it or THOBE! Thanks Michelle. Note:I KEEP TRIPPING OVER MY DRESS!!!!! Stairs are my nemesis.

Yesterday I ran 4 the first time in a month without the vest.Im so much stronger and faster its ridiculous. I can ACTUALLY run.Today I started trying to quit smoking it felt so good running. Monday starts Beast Mode training anyway, but as i mentioned some of it wont be geared towards running etc. I made a decision to try and attend ALL prayers at the mosque, which will create distance between me and family, because i will no longer be able to stay out in the country on weekends and problems at work (im telling them in a few minutes), but anyway.  initially i had planned this attempt for Ramadan, but earlier in the week after i wrote that entry to my blog i decided NOW and as part of Beast Mode that Id try. 

Im kinda n a rush rite now, problems at work etc. But Ive also probably decided to remarry.  I researched sharia, sunna, fiqh and hadith and sharia (islamic laws, ways of life, accepted practices and way of the prophet- etc) and there is no realistic excuse i can make.  The prophet (rasulallah sallah lahu alaihi wasallam) didn’t make any exception for anything that I would qualify for not to accept the reponsibility of marriage, will discuss further later but) 

” Abstention from marriage is to be deprived of all these noble benefits. Therefore it is abominable to refrain from marriage if there is no valid reason.”

” O Ukaaf! (while you remain unmarried, you are like a brother to shaitan (satan).  If you ahd been among the Nasaara you would have become a monk. (Our Islam’s way is Nikah (marriage)…”

I personally have no valid excuse.  Though I love what me and my ex-wife shared and the baby ZAHRAH!!!!!!!!!! we will continue to share, me previously wanting or being available to reconcile my previous marriage is not applicable, that was just me trying to work MY will instead of HIS WILL and not following the ways of the propet (rasulallah sallah lahu alaihi wasallam).  So keep me in your prayers that by Allah’s (SWT) grace i can be successful this time and not make mistakes previously made.



My intent will have to be ademdummed to try and make as many prayers at mosque as possible, my employer is not too keen it seems on me missing that amount of work, commission rep or not, especilally in regards to the message it will send to other employees.

Im also personally concerned about making the isha (or last prayer) and how with travel time that won’t leave much room for sleep and could cause me to oversleep the fajr (or morning) prayer which is significantly more important in regards to the reward received.  maybe ill just move closer to the mosque?

peace (before i get fired)


got my comp back, but @ what cost (the drive to drop it off and pick it up dealt with a gentleman my parents don’t seem to like because they dont approve of our other business concerning a car-who also happens to have a computer repair business).  bike still not repaired or back.

Let’s start. the gentleman has shown me kindness w/the car AND the ridiculously low price to repair a crashed computer, boost it to pentium 4, add all kinds of safeguards, spam, virus protection etc and so much software etc. AND GETTING ME THE FULL ROSETTA STONE.  I really only needed arabic 1 and 2 at this time he got me 27 languages.  And i lost all my music when the computer got fixed, so he gave me about a 10 Gig worth. THANKS JOHN VITALE.

I didnt go against my parents, but IM NOT DISRESPECTING ANYONE WHO DOESNT DESERVE IT AND THAT ATTEMPTS TO HELP ME FROM THEIR HEART TO PLEASE ANYONE, BECAUSE WITH GREAT CONFIDENCE I KNOW IT DOES NOT PLEASE ALLAH (SWT). Some people will sell themselves and ultimately their souls to please their parents or others. Go head wicha bad self.  I wont.

ANYWAY picking me up etc and my semi-dramatic lifestyle changes and appilcation of spirituality and islamic customs (they’ve seen me in the dresses four fridays in a row) as well as not seeing eye 2 eye on many things regarding my marriage, divorce, handling of my responsibilities w/my child and ex-wife/step son/ex-in-laws may have finally taken their toll.  this is the first week in about 5 or 6 that i was NOT invited to spend w/my family in Hudson and there is even a family event going on.  I probably would have had to pass or only go on Sat/Sun, but it would have felt nice to have been asked. 

You know alot of time in life a simple thank you or consideration go along ways.  There are certain people that for whatever reason don’t even have the courteousness to be polite, even say thank you. some even wont respond to hello or worst yet not respond to an islamic salaam or respond very reluctantly, which is TOTALLY WITHOUT QUESTION HARAM, but i am not judging any specific individual or circumstance.  Actually for any out there in Khalifahland who are muslim, the prophet (salla lahu alaihi wassalaam) stated that salaams should be returned with more enthusiasm than given, but that it is obligatory to return them and to return them with at least as much spirit as they were given.  But alot of people like to play dress-up (muslim or otherwise-hi boss!)).  I remember when i was challenged by someone about the notion of whether i just wanted to play house or not when we were “seeing” each other so to speak.  Well actions spoke louder than words because i married them.  Ive never been one much for playing.

Getting back to family.  My adult life in general has been a strain on my family and me in regards to how we relate with each other.  It is obligatory in islam that i seek to maintain a relationship with them and show respect.  Unfortunately i believe we are coming to a point of no return in relationship to communicating or spending much time together.  I will treasure the recent block of time spent, even if mainly weekend.  But Im not going to stop being muslim or ME for anyone.  Indirectly my decision towards remarrying im sure plays a part in this as well (given the fact that my mother pretty much said directly that she opposes this).  my decision on a certain car, possibly attending an islamic graduate program in the fall, the desire to become an imam and several other recent decisions on my part i am sure also play a part.  But that’s okay.  I no longer will attempt to please ANY MAN OR WOMAN ON THIS PLANET EVER AGAIN. The only entity I am here to please or desire to please is ALLAH (SWT).

Well im am taking a full rest day, Inshallah (God be Willing), i dont plan on even lifting.  I’ll go lite two days then its on. 



Increased and perfection of prayer in congregation and when leading it (attept fajr morning prayer everyday and at least one other.  (though GM @ work later said i could go to dhur, it may not be feasible until next month)

Complete closure to emotions from previous woes and relationships of any kind

No tobacco

Consitency in work efforts and workout participation (average two a days for the month)

Help others

This is a short and very partial and scatterbrained list.



~ by siddiq khalifah on July 11, 2008.


  1. You gotta be joking?
    Why are you in such a hurry to get married?
    How does one get on your list for interviews?
    But on the real. You should take your time and make sure that you’ve found the right person and situation and that you are really ready.
    That’s from the heart brother.

    Now what up with that email address, potnah?

  2. khalifahgirl, i dont even believ u r a real person. u mysteriously appeared after i passed out some flyers @ work, like that day. i actually think u r a guy and not a girl and i have my suspicions, BUT IF u really r a girl and i dont know u id like 2 know how u came across this site/blog? And i dont really have a public email, you know being a superhero and all, BUT u can email WEBMASTER JOHN, his address is on the site and he loves emails. But FYI, NOT 4 MY email, but i think u can see wordpress member emails if u do a little leg work, if u are registered, which obviously u r if u can leave comments?


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